Strong Memories
by banryuu
Summary: When the ending is just a chance at a new beginning. Fanelia celebrates the wedding of it's king, but Van's memories tell the whole story. Following the story that starts with vows to love, honor, and cherish until the last shared breath. Rated M for good reasons.
1. Just the Beginning

**Hello friend! I'll keep most comments to the end except for one. This is a mature story with themes and descriptions not meant for underage readers. If sexual acts are not your preference, please refrain from reading this story. I have other stories that are more neutral so feel free to navigate towards one of those. Otherwise disregard this warning at your own discretion. **

**Strong Memories**

**Chapter One- Just the Beginning**

Memory is a strange thing. Time fades some things and sharpens others. There are so many days in my life I'll never forget and a few that I wish I could. You see I don't recall my father, just his funeral and the way my mother cried. My brother ten years older was who I remember reading me bedtime stories, and playing with me in the gardens. Then he too was gone from my life. All I know of my family after that was a sad silent shadow of my mother until she too left me.

The only family remaining was a small cat-eared child, who had lost her's long before, in this sorrow we were related. A country without a king, ruled by his remaining council until I met the minimum age for the rite of passage, as my brother had before me. An old scarred samurai as a teacher, mentor, but not a father.

Those years passed in blurs of whispers and doubts. Could I succeed where my brother failed? Could a child really rule our land? Did the council want to give up control after so much time in power? Was this really what was best for our people? Would it be better if I like the rest just never came back? Might it be fate? Our curse running true as the old timers always predicted it would?

The pressure of all that weighing down on my shoulders, ones I knew were thin for my age, but being wiry doesn't mean weak. Balgus made sure of that. Training until I could barely stand, or hold the blade too large and heavy for me. The skin on my hands split and re-healed so many times I stopped taking off my gloves except to wash, even to eat and sometimes sleep they stayed on.

Merle who grew out of her childish lisp, but never that clinging attachment to me. As much as people might frown about holding to the scrap of family I had left, or indulging her moods, none of it mattered. She and the old man were all I had left. Even as I aged closer to the deadline. Twelfth white moon of my fifteenth year came up so fast, and then my world changed.

One moment I was chasing fresh dragon tracks through wild grass: the next bright light was everywhere, lifting me, carrying my layers of armor and small arsenal onto another planet. One where a girl my age thought I was a figment of her imagination, only the repeating of a vision she didn't fully understand. Crashing solidly into my side, and like any attack I did as I was trained, I stood defensively strong.

She landed heavily on the strange ground. Two people rushing to her side, looked at me as though I was the one who had attacked her. When my arm still throbbed through the layers I had thought would protect me from a dragon. The same type of armor Folken wore ten years ago. It wouldn't even help me against a single girl. One with eyes like gemstones, but I wrote her off as just another bystander that would probably not want to be eaten by a dragon, but that was their choice.

As it was, they ran, but must have been the tastier snack as the beast was far more interested in them than me. It's thick tail smashing into me felt worse than the girl, but at least the dragon I expected. I remember every detail of the fight. The heat, taste of blood in my mouth, even the girl shouting just in time to save my life. When a spiked tail cut right where I had just been, slicing through chain and plate armor like it was nothing.

I didn't hesitate, striking at the first sign of weakness just as the beast would have. Slicing into the exposed soft underbelly, blue blood spraying, darting around so that I could open the glowing chest while the dragon screamed. The second gush of hot fluid coating me entirely, but once the energist was out all of the blood covering me began to steam away. Thick scaly skin, bone, and organs turning into ash on the wind.

Then the girl was there, and I just thought, gods not another person that wants something from me. I never expected to get hit by her a second time. It wouldn't be the last either. Sometimes it was to save my life crashing into each other over and over again, and sometimes she had to do it to remind me that I wasn't alone. That I didn't have to take on the world on my own. It was something I forgot in the blood and pain, with the darkness that wanted to swallow me from the inside out. It nearly succeeded more than a few times.

The dragon wasn't the first thing to turn to ash at my touch. For the most part I had even started to believe in all the negative whispers that have followed my whole life. The draconian curse haunted the back of my mind with everything bad that happened, and there were a lot of terrible reminders. There were times I wished to have a poorer memory. As if there were a way to make myself forget the screams of my people as they were tragically slaughtered. Celebration quickly morphing into screams, blood, and fire.

I didn't fall in love, but crashed into it, with that same troublesome girl bit by bit. She did the impossible, repeatedly and I couldn't stop from falling. Being young and inexperienced, the gradual change in my feelings didn't quite make those tumultuous times any easier. To be honest of all my years full of tutors and training they all neglected lessons on how to understand women, especially ones from other worlds with a temper as short as her hair.

I never really thought about a romantic future. Not being killed by a dragon was my most pressing issue for years. I'd always sort of been okay with the council picking someone suitable for me. It's not that I didn't find women attractive, but it seemed a pointless thing to worry about. Folken had been betrothed to a princess before his disappearance. An alliance strained by whispers that the missing prince had run from responsibility, our relationship with Asturia hadn't been the same since.

When the blond princess had been reminiscing about her visit to my country as a child I doubt she knew that it had been more diplomatic then a friendly visit. Her middle sister and my older brother had to meet in order to finalize the betrothal agreement. Fanelia has never believed in blind marriage contracts, so I knew when someone was chosen for me, I would at least get to meet her. It was more say then some royals got. Then again no one would enter into an agreement until I was king, it was too much of a risk to promise a daughter to someone who might never return.

Imagine my surprise when the other countries turned out right not to want a premature alliance, but it was no longer a country without a king, instead I became a king without his country. To think that that disaster helped me to see what I had been missing for so long. Someone that thought about me and not my crown. Who would risk herself literally running into danger for a boy who hadn't always been the kindest to her.

Just like the armor I wore the night we first met, my arrogance and blunt dismissal was meant to protect me from injury, but it was about as effective. Which is to say, easily penetrated by a sudden attack I never saw coming. She thought my curse was beautiful. Running to my side over and again over like we were drawn together, powerful magnets pulled by unseen forces. When worried for me when I was drowning in revenge, even when I completely lost my way.

It was better that her attention always lay elsewhere, it would make the promise to my mentor that much easier to keep. I wanted to protect her even if I wasn't the one she wanted. Still I couldn't have anticipated that her feelings towards me would change to something more.

She saved me from myself. Then it was time to let her go. Keep my promises, and that was possibly the hardest thing I've ever done. It was good too. Finishing this the way we started, together. The main difference was me, I wasn't living under the weight of whispers and curses. No longer hiding behind a wall of doubt and attitude.

That girl taught me it is was okay to care. Doing so didn't make me weak, instead it made me stronger. The rumors became legends, and that turned into power that I could use, another weapon in my arsenal.

As I rebuilt my country, the people returned. Not just the ones native to Fanelia who had fled and survived after the destruction, but others who lost everything answered my call, and they found comfort in the stories of the white dragon. A chance at a new life.

It caused more then just an infusion of citizens, but the potential that came with the promise of a future without war. Escaflowne slept and Fanelia thrived, but still a part of my life remained missing. In a way the war brought me a new family, but the green-eyed girl was the glue that had held or mismatched party together, without her it wasn't complete.

Of course, before I was a liability as an untried prince, the King of Fanelia and Pilot of the Escaflowne was an embarrassingly sought-after match. For most of my life I remained neutral about who and when I would be paired with my future queen. Now, I couldn't quite say that is was true.

In the years since everything happened both my council and outside forces tried to push favorable candidates. It I hadn't fallen so deeply in love this would have been so much easier. I might have agreed to marry some princess who was pretty and tolerable, I may have even grown to care for her. None of that was possible really, not anymore.

I always found myself comparing any of the women to her, or at least the memory I held so close. Merle said I was being unreasonable. Unfair even, since no one could ever live up to a memory, a fantasy really. At twenty moons it was finally time to put the past where it belongs.

After all it is my wedding day. It was time to move forward. For a long time, I even wondered if I would make it this far. My hands are steady as I fasten my sword belt across the long-embroidered vest, smoothing the crimson and gold fabric once the weight settles fully. I don't need to wear the crested sword, but it like my gloves are a constant comfort.

A small knock at the door comes followed by my sister entering the room, letting me know it was time.

This is when my life changes again. A memory that will either be sharpened with time or blur together like a whirlwind of colors. Expectant faces follow my entrance to the shrine, rebuilt and protecting Escaflowne once more. Sure, this could be done in the main courtyard for the whole city to witness, or on the palace roof at sunset in a private ceremony, but this choice like all the others feels right. Since this is where my life took a completely unexpected course. Where survival and revenge were impossible to separate.

I also learned a leader's true responsibility is to his people, it wasn't something I could understand locked in a training room. That true kindness has no limits, when caring isn't a liability, and I never had to be alone.

The music shifts and those invited to witness today go silent. A tall golden-haired knight stationed directly behind the Astorian Royal family, caught my eye with his crystalline blue ones. With a knowing smile Allen motioned upward slightly. One hand drifts to follow his clue, only to find the thick golden circlet at my brow had shifted down unevenly on one side. With a deep sigh to relieve my nerves I fixed the lopsided crown, and no one was paying me any mind, the whole crowd watching the entrance expectantly.

Merle appeared first; her bright hair pulled to one side tumbling over a single shoulder in one large corkscrew of curls, bringing out the color of her butter yellow dress. My sister may have been holding an overflowing bundle of wildflowers in a riot of colors, her large expressive eyes rolled at me. She could still read me better than anyone and reminded me of how stiff I was. With a deep breath I relaxed my tense shoulders, earning a real smile from the Neko girl.

As if drawn by an invisible force my attention locked on the woman just starting down the aisle. Her lean body is athletic but soft in all the right places, attractive, stunning even in the layers of white trimmed along all edges with gold and silver embroidered designs. The long sheer veil moving around her like a soft cloud.

I must have stopped breathing again, because the world sped up and she was right there next to me. Silently she turned passing the cascade of flowers I hadn't even noticed she was carrying to Merle who stood just off to the side. The slender hand then came towards me, I hesitated for only a second before taking it in my own and leading her forward. Together we stepped into the exact center of the painted floor, directly under the encased armor that was my past, with the woman who held my future.

The priest was there waiting for us, and as we turned towards each other I found it was more awe then nerves that made my movements feel clumsy and slow now, as I lifted the gold trimmed veil. Full kissable lips and large emerald green eyes smiled at me.

Hitomi was so beautiful I could barely breathe. "Careful now, your face might stick like that." She teased softly, but her hand trembled slightly in my own. The girl from the mystic moon was as flustered as I was, but she didn't wear a goofy smile like I apparently did.

"It's just," I swallowed the lump in my throat before continuing. "You seem to get more beautiful every time I see you."

She laughed lightly and though faint, was the most musical sound in this or any world. "You know Van, flattery will get you married."

I squeezed her hand firmly. "I'm counting on it." Flowery speeches were not my specialty, but honesty was.

The priest cleared his throat, and a wave of good-natured chuckling surrounded us. The rest of the world came back into focus, and half of it seemed to be in the shrine, watching happily. After that we followed the holy-man's prompts. Swearing in front of everyone to love, honor, and cherish each other till our last shared breath. Obedience was a part of the original oath, but we requested it be removed for our vows. Neither of us wanted to lie, as we knew from the start that we are both stubborn and only understanding will make it work, not submission.

The rings were next. Identical gold bands twisted and engraved to appear like the thin dragon from the crest that has followed my life, wings tucked around the serpent like body. I paused before taking Hitomi's ring, instead I removed my gloves, tucking the brown leather into my belt. The softness of her hand against the exposed callouses felt both strange and exciting. The metal slid easily to rest on her slender finger. Then my hand was in hers, she paused seeing the rough cracked, badly healed skin that I always hid.

"I've always been surprised that you never had any scars after the war." She whispered rubbing small circles with her thumb in the thick callouses on my palm. "It seems you've been hiding them all along."

I swallowed hard, barely feeling anything, but her hands gently moving the ring into place. Just the electric charge passing between us. Then my hand with the new golden ring was cupping her soft cheek, and I was kissing her. Cheers and clapping erupted from everywhere at once.

Hitomi's veil once removed was replaced with a thin circlet of braided gold and silver. The priest then announced her as Queen Hitomi Kanzaki de Fanel, and us as husband and wife. We took our first steps together, the start of the next part of our journey.

I knew we were expected to go directly to the reception, but, well I didn't want to. Instead the two of us ran for it, her laughter making my grin widen. No words were needed, she followed my lead into the palace, until we reached the stairs. She hesitated yanking on my arm slightly, and I saw the problem right away. Her long skirts weren't made for a quick get-away.

My grin lifted more on one side, and I could see her cheeks flush in response. It could also be the way I knelt slightly, an arm under her long legs, sweeping Hitomi into my arms in one smooth move. Then I was taking the stairs swiftly, two at a time in some cases, but didn't stop at the floor with our room. Instead I made it all the way to the roof in record time. Her slender arms still around my neck.

I almost didn't want to set her down. Still held the embrace as her feet touched the flat stones. Before I could say anything her soft lips were on mine. The heat passing through us like an irresistible current. Without breaking apart one of her hands threaded through my hair, pulling me closer and deepening the kiss.

Finally, we had to separate otherwise we'd never make it down to the party. Not that I would mind so much, but we'll have plenty of time later, or so I'm hoping.

"I stopped believing in stories with happy endings a very long time ago." My voice was low, but it was just the two of us, as it should be. "Until I met you and everything changed."

"That's not true." I could feel the piercing look in her eyes all the way to my core. "This isn't a happy ending, since it's just the beginning."

These are the memories that I want to hold on to forever deep in my heart, but I know from here on each day will be brighter than the last. Despite my inner desire to extend this private breath of fresh air, reluctantly we rejoined the celebrations. Just making the rounds of our guests took up most of the night. Even the portions of the evening where Hitomi and I were supposed to be together moved past at record speeds. I wanted to slow down time and savor each moment, like a sweet dessert where each bite is more amazing than the last.

The night and festivities wore on, but there never seemed to be a good time to escape. At one point I was cornered by an older Egzdardian man who was enthusiastically regaling me of stories from the last king of Fanelia's wedding to a mysterious woman, more than thirty moons ago. At some point Hitomi and I had been separated even though she was far better at getting out of these situations than I. Allen instead arrived with a timely excuse for my attention, making me grateful to my long-time friend all over again.

Before I could ask what he truly needed the tall knight placed a hand in the center of my back, giving me a strong push towards the doors. "Go, quickly." He urged low enough so only I could hear. "Hitomi is waiting."

I could have stopped and asked what he meant, but at that point I didn't care. With the blond man as a distraction I escaped into the far quieter corridor, which was empty. Confused for a second, I started down, slowly away from the guests that might still be enjoying our hospitality until the early hours, a time which I'd rather not be with them.

Distracted as I was, it came as a complete surprise when an arm snaked out from a darkened doorway tugging me back a step or two. Instinct to fight, attack, respond defensively flares to life quickly. Only the familiar perfume, like bright summer sunshine and vibrant wildflowers told who my attacker truly was. Hitomi's open smile was my second clue, but I already knew.

She took the initiative this time kissing me with a heat that told me the best part of the evening was yet to come. All the words in either world could express the depth of this connection. If the electric charge could burn us alive, we'd catch together. Her hands moved from my chest up to tangle in the always wild hair, skewing my crown without a care. My pulse pounded through my head blind to anything but Hitomi.

So many times I dreamt of this, of being together not just bond in the eyes of the world, but ready for our life together to being for real. We'd remained connected the four moons she remained on the mystic moon, I waited. When Hitomi returned I kept true to expectations of decorum despite neither of us being children before. All the times I'd wanted to touch her. Hold this slim body against mine, like the missing half to a whole person, incomplete without each other.

She pulled away by only a breath, stilling enough to whisper against my lips "I love you," Ready to burst apart with all the things that I could only share with her, as though my soul pushed against the containment of my skin.

Somehow, we made it back to our room, wanting this to be more than frenzied moments hidden in a parlor where anyone could stumble upon us. There's never been a woman for me that wasn't Hitomi, and I the only man for her. The door clicked behind us, desperate hands discarding our crowns amidst the growing pile of clothing on the floor. Hitomi's progress was halted by the row of tiny ties holding her dress in place. Wordlessly my fingers found the small knots, tightened by our energetic pulling, and worked the ribbons loose in what felt like painfully long moments. Then I was pushing the layers of fabric from her slender shoulders, pooling the priceless dress onto the floor like the cumbersome cloth it was. My vest and belt long gone, the shirt came off next, and her fingers found my bare skin as though learning the shape and feel of me by touch alone.

Breathe becoming more ragged, my lips found the edge of her jaw and began trailing downward, studying the curve of her neck a kiss at a time. My name escaped her like a prayer, and it was all I could do to keep from fragmenting into a million pieces, kept together only by my love for her. We stumbled towards the bed together, not seeing anything but each other.

Falling backwards I pulled Hitomi down so that she landed on top of me, her slighter form molded down the length of my body. Yet we still kissed like the world was ending, and only our continued passion could save us. Her legs shifted to either side of my hips, the straddling position a promise, or invention, it didn't matter because my breeches remained in place an unnecessary separation between us.

With a moan I used my superior strength to roll us over in one swift controlled movement. Hitomi let out a small surprised sound that nearly made my blood boil in response. Keeping my balance from pressing her down into the soft mattress I broke the kiss to look down at her. Chest heaving as though running a race, the motion causing her firm breasts to slip free of the thin fabric undergarments she'd worn under the dress. Straps loosely slid from slender shoulders and flimsy skirt hiked up to show the rest of her bare. The perfect shape of her form free to my gaze and I wanted to kiss and touch the entire expanse of sensitive flesh like a drowning man needs air.

As if reading my thoughts, Hitomi arched up in response to my desire. Her own wishes clear as I felt fingertips trail purposefully downward to my own unnecessary clothing. Carving a path of fire along the way. Without hesitation she unfastened the stays of my pants and pushed the fabric down over my narrow hips. Digging the balls of my feet into the mattress I pressed forward letting her push the cloth down enough until I could kick them off the rest of the way, now entirely bear to her.

I could feel her gaze on me with heat, love, and desire. The seamless tan of my muscled flesh completely on view for the first time. I'd never been shy about the loss of a shirt or several in the past, but now I was completely vulnerable. Dragging my view away from her body I saw everything there in clearly written in Hitomi's eyes. The want was there trying to disguise her nervousness, this being both our first time we knew that not all of this would be pleasant for my new wife. She bit her lip, torn between fearing the pain and complete love for me.

Shifting my weight again I cupped her cheek in one hand forcing worried green eyes to meet mine. "I know," I said simply. All the love I had for her clear in my eyes, after a moment the tension seemed to leave her, and she nodded. The kiss I instigated was softer than before. Full of tenderness, as my hand left her face and moved lower, trailing soft touches down until her breath became ragged again, small gasps and moans like music as my fingers worked.

When she arched up towards me on instinct, I took the opportunity, smooth yet as gently as possible. Hitomi's breath came out as a sharp hiss of pain, I stilled waiting for the worst to pass. Coaxing her with kisses as touches as a distraction from the unpleasant side of this. My love for her overflowing. I felt her relax, yet still didn't move until she said my name again, her own movements attempting to take control.

Together we learned a rhythm, one that brought both our breaths and actions quicker, more frantic. Until she tightened around me, hands that had been on my shoulders dug blunt nails into the flesh there, her voice mingling with mine as we both finished together.

Panting and spent I rolled off her, if only to pull Hitomi to my chest, our sweat dampened skin, hot and the air still felt electrified. Kissing the top of her head I apologized for the pain, even if we both knew it was unavoidable. She shrugged it off, sleepy and content now. I felt her breaths deepen as happy exhaustion took over. Full of love for the woman in my arms and an impossible contentment for the start of our life together.

As Hitomi had said this wasn't a happily ever after, just the beginning of the rest of our journey, one that we walked hand in hand. Until the very end. I for one can't wait to see what comes next.

**To be continued…**

**A/N- Well… Not Quite Normal has a little left, Bitter Medicine is about halfway and waiting for inspiration. Then this story this which was a one shot come to mind. You see I started this one a long time ago and got to the point where Hitomi pulls Van into an empty room down the hall from the party. I was torn between leaving it PG and taking it into more mature content. As you can see it didn't stay innocent in the end. This was also intended as a oneshot… then I received a request from a regular reviewer to see a story that started with a wedding instead of ending at one like most continuations.**

**This was edited by Meghanna Starsong in only the original portion, but the rest is self-edited **

**It's possible this will stay her at the original ending, but the idea is to switch to Hitomi's perspective in the next chapter and go back and forth showing the first year of their marriage, the good and the bad, but always in love. I don't know when the next chapter with come into being as I still have the other two stories on the program, but this is the only mature one of the lot, so bear with me please. **

**As always, I can't wait to hear what you think.**


	2. Something New

**Welcome back! I've been rolling steady recently. Not sure how long it will last, but I'm not questioning the spat of productivity. Working towards the end of Not Quite Normal, and preparing to pick Bitter Medicine back up. I also have a new story idea and some inspiration to work on one called Green-eyed Girl. It's best I focus on two stories tops at a time, otherwise I stall, but I won't hesitate to write down ideas when they pop up.**

**Thank you everyone for the positive reviews. It seems that this is something a lot of people want to see. Growth doesn't stop after marriage if anything the story beginning after I Do is just as important if not more so. **

**Last note before we head right in. This is a mature story with sexual themes that are not for everyone. Proceed with that in mind, heck it might be why you are here. This is a no judgement zone.**

**Chapter Two- Something New**

There are sometimes that I wish my mind could record and play back at will. To be able to revisit the good moments, and there are far more of those then bad ones. Despite what I experienced during the war I'd do it all over again without changing a thing. Actions have consequences as I learned the hard way, but it was a lesson I needed. One that will come in handy now that the rest of my life is no longer just my own.

I found the idea of being queen terrifying, and it was a major factor on why I hesitated to come back. Years where I loved him only from a distance. Our connection remained, but it was like loving a ghost. We both felt the loneliness, but Van never pressured me to return. Truly being with him would be a lifetime commitment, not just to him, but also his people.

Most little girls dream of the fairytale ending where they shed a regular life for something far grander. I wasn't exactly normal in that regard. Growing up as an active child that ran faster than any of the boys in my neighborhood and refused to back down from a challenge. I never dreamt of being swept off my feet, but as life turns out was literally a few times.

When I did grow into the romantic notions, I was fifteen and had my first crush on the captain of the boy's track team. Someone I admired more from afar even back then his slight popularity and quiet kindness were almost too much for me.

Then my world spun out of control. One moment I am challenging myself to win a first kiss, and the next moment I go crashing right into _him_. The boy that landed right in my path was about as far as you could get from prince charming and yet in some ways he was. As in actually a prince, but far from charming.

Van Fanel was probably the only person on any world more stubborn than me. Tragic family history. Deep dark secret. Losing everything in a sudden and violent attack. Consumed by a world of blood, hate, and revenge. It was the real boy deep down that I fell in love with; he was almost shy, gentle, and compassionate. Not to mention reckless, single-minded, and in some ways exactly what was needed.

Years ago, on my first trip to Gaia I remember being surprised by how easily I'd settled into life, adapting to the new cultures, marveling at the beautiful world, and making friends with people I'd never have expected. The war was terrible, and more so because I saw the ugly senseless destruction firsthand, but it gave me something real to defend for the first time.

I loved Gaia and my friends here, more than I could ever put into words. Even with all the horrible things I saw. There was always something that resonated deep down. Then I fell in love, not just with the world I'd never known existed. Wild hair and quick to temper, but deep down he would always be the sweet boy that loved his family and people without question. Unexpectantly thoughtful, but very inexperienced with those who didn't fit into his expectations, like me.

It might have been one of the times we saved each other, or the rare moments where we connected on a deeper level, but I couldn't have anticipated how much I'd care for him. All the parts, even the ones that made me want to smack some sense into him. Still he kept his word and sent me home.

At first it was strange to be back like nothing happened, still there was something missing. The rolling green hills leading into a steep valley that surrounded Fanelia's capital city. Crisp spring air scented with rich earth and green shoots, but mostly him.

Van and I had retained our connection, but it was a hollow victory. I'd gotten so used to his presence that for the first time in my life I was lonely. Back home the visions weren't gone, though they weren't overwhelming like before. Really it was his calm understanding that flowed down our bond that kept me sane.

After four years I felt that I'd lived enough of the life expected of me and returned to Gaia and Van. I love my family and friends, but there was a whole world that still called to me. A path where I wasn't alone in my memories. It didn't take long for Van to propose, and with a light heart I agreed, wanting nothing more than to spend the rest of my life at his side. Even if that meant something larger than a standard marriage.

I might never really _get used_ to any of this. Being queen, was a weight I hadn't wanted or expected. It was one of the reasons I stayed away for so long. Then I came to a realization that changed everything. Van hadn't chosen his life. It had been decided for him but that never stopped him from putting his very soul into it.

For his people. For Fanelia. Now and for the rest of our lives for me. I wasn't taking on responsibility without cause, and I wouldn't be doing it alone. He'd support me the same way I longed to be there for him. So, saying yes was easy. I could be Queen of Fanelia, because I already had the best guide at my side.

Getting ready was like living in a blur, one made from layers of silk and embroidered details I'd never be able to remember. The bouquet of wildflowers in my hands hid the slight tremor of nerves. Being watched and judged by the crowd frightened me more than the small doubt that I wasn't good enough.

I passed where Allen stood sentry behind Millearna and Dryden's little family. Our eyes locked and his held only joy for me. Our odd little half-romance long past I felt only brotherly affection for the knight, a different kind of love. Taking a deep breath: I passed friends and strangers, nobles and commoners alike. All that mattered was the finish line. Where Van stood waiting for me, his crown slightly skewed to one side.

He looked so handsome in the long-belted vest in Fanelian crimson and gold. Still I liked normal casual Van best. Strong arms bare, loose tunic hinting only at the leanly muscled form. Even with wearing the look of being struck dumb by a hard blow to the head he was better than any fake fairytale prince.

I'd never fully seen his hands without gloves on before the exchanging of rings. The expectation was that he'd have callouses there from years of training, but that was putting it lightly. I could see the sacrifice and pain written on the flesh marred with old memories of working till the skin split, knuckles marked with countless failed blocks. Tenderly I rubbed the pad of my thumb in small circles before sliding the engraved ring on his finger where it belonged.

The hand now adorned with the golden dragon cupped my cheek almost reverently. Then his lips connected with mine and the spark between us burned brightly. A promise of what was still to come.

We were married and he never had to hide from me again. My heart welled with love for him. Instead of walking back past the watching crowd Van grabbed my hand and lead me out of the temple at a jog. An open joyful smile lighting up his handsome face. I followed matching his pace, even with my long skirts, until we reached the stairs. Tugging on his hand slightly I motioned to the problem.

I loved the way his smile lifted more on one side, a mischievous note that made my heart rate speed up. Even more so when he bent down scooping me up into his arms as though I weighed nothing. Taking the steps quickly I hadn't even noticed the passing, because the feel of being pressed protectively against his solid chest, the way the touch of his hands burned even through the bunched skirts. Before I knew it my feet touched down on the flat rooftop. A place Van felt most comfortable, where he'd come to practice alone or think through difficult issues. Now he shared it with me, and we looked over Fanelia, King and Queen, servants of the people, together.

This time I moved to kiss his full lips, the spark from earlier catching into a flame. One hand remained at his neck while the other traveled up threading into his thick hair, parting my lips and inviting him in to share my passion. Eventually we had to separate, breath already coming faster.

"I stopped believing in stories with happy endings a very long time ago." Van's voice was low with a delicious husky tone that made me want to forget about the party and keep this just the two of us. "Until I met you and everything changed."

"That's not true." I looked into his warm eyes wanting to express how much I loved him. "This isn't a happy ending, since it's just the beginning."

We did make it back down to our guests. Even if my mind remained on the roof with stolen moments and passionate kisses. I'm sure it was a fantastic party, but I couldn't wait for it to end. At one-point Van had been commandeered by an ambassador or something who was old enough to have been a guest at the last wedding held here in Fanelia.

Deciding that I'd shared him enough for one evening I didn't walk towards Van, but away. I caught Allen and knew before asking that he'd be willing to help.

"The only way this night ever ends is if we escape separately." His sharp blue eyes darted towards Van who still hadn't extricated himself from the same man. "Could you get him towards the door for me?"

"It would be my honor." Allen chuckled, offering me his elbow as an escort. We walked the edges of the gathering together, making a loop that brought me to the door without arising suspicion. "Go on," He urged with a knowing smile.

I slipped out and found the halls felt like a different world. Moving a little way down I chose a small vacant parlor to wait, but it didn't take long. Van wandered past me almost distractedly. Before he could get too far, I reached out pulling him into the darkness with me. There was a moment where the fight instinct flared to life if only briefly.

My kiss was returned with equal if not greater passion. Hands moving up to his hair like before, but this time I felt the ghost of his touch move from my back to sides, then lower, lost in the sensations. The way our quickened breaths mingled together made me lightheaded. Becoming increasingly drunk off each other. One of Van's hands cupped my rear pulling my body flush against his, need evident through layers of fabric.

It took considerable will power to break the connection of our fevered kisses if only to speak three simple words into the heated air between us. "I love you." A whole world of memories and emotions filled that one little phrase.

I'd loved him before I knew what it really was. When we were still forming into the people life needed us to become. This connection was more than attraction, it was a soul deep connection. One that glowed with warmth and limitless potential. There were times where it never seemed like we'd get here, but the tough times were all worth it because it brought us together.

With remarkable restraint we made it back to the room. I could still feel the wandering of his hands even before the door fully shut. Each touch burning hot, scorching until the fabric itself seemed to catch. First went the belt and then vest, followed by our crowns. The difficulty was with my clothing not Van's, his came off easily enough, but mine was knotted tighter by our frantic movements.

With deft fingers the ties fastening the elaborate dress came free one by one, the way he knelt before me, attention focused. Looking at his handsome profile was almost too much, then the layers of silk came free with a small tug. Then he was slipping the dress off my shoulders and I his shirt. Studying the expanse of exposed tanned skin with the tips of my fingers as though touch alone could teach me all his secrets.

With a ragged breath Van pulled me close again, his lips starting just below my ear and traveling down kiss by kiss, tracing the curve of my neck and causing sensations to pool much lower. His name slipping from my lips like a whispered promise. One that led us blindly towards the bed lost in each other, completely and totally.

The world spun briefly as we fell onto the mattress, Van turning us just so that I landed on top of him. Yet even with the sudden position change we hadn't broken apart. Kissing was like breathing, we couldn't survive without continuing.

From my vantage point above him I was aware that my control of the situation was solely because Van was enjoying it this way. Once things progressed much farther, he'd take the lead, but for now I wanted to make the most of the situation. Shifting to straddle him, wearing only the thin under dress that seemed like a combination of bra and slip, but that was all. I kneeled in positioned over this strong sexy man and he wore more clothing then I, and only I knew it.

Maybe he'd guessed after all, because with a deep throaty moan Van's muscles tensed and rippled moments before flipping us over. My back pressed into the soft padding, he broke the kiss and I marveled at the way his smooth hard chest could still hold me gently with all the strength he contained. Watching those mahogany eyes almost molten with heat, framed by wild raven hair. By the feel of bunched fabric, the top no longer contained my breasts and the skirts hiked up, I might as well be naked. Being desired so openly was a powerful feeling.

More than anything I wanted to see and touch him too. My hands traced a path downward to the pants that have overstayed their welcome. Unfastening the last article of clothing keeping us apart quickly, and with more confidence then I felt. He moved with my efforts making the task easier within my limited reach from below him.

Then he was bare, completely unashamed and with good reason. I'd seen Van without a shirt more times then needed counting, but this was the first time I saw him fully. Having nothing to compare to was both good and bad. I never wanted anyone like this other than the man braced above me, but I also feared that he might not fit.

I wanted this, needed him more than I ever desired anything in my whole life. Even lacking actual experience I knew this would hurt, and the last thing Van would want was to cause me pain, but there wasn't another way around it. Biting my lip, I tried to focus on all the wonderful feelings, and prayed they would overshadow the pain that was surely coming.

Above me Van shifted one hand tenderly cupping my cheek, dragging my gaze away from his length and back to his deeply expressive eyes. "I know," The two simple words said a novel worth.

He loved me, and I him. This was right and the bad part would be a temporary cost that would need to be paid for a lifetime of wonderful. If there was a way to skip the next bit he would, but just knowing the depth of his compassion eased the nervous tension that had taken over. I nodded, and he kissed me again. This time softer, still full of passion, but speaking of love and not lust.

The hand not bracing his body above mine moved from my face working downward touching and teasing along the way. Fingers calloused from years of training circled my nipples until the sensitive flesh hardened with excitement. The way he learned by the sound of my breathy moans showed by the attention, even more so when those deft fingers found my core. I nearly arched right off the bed with a gasp. Intense feelings like little electric shocks, then he was pushing into me.

Pain unlike anything I'd ever felt before ripped through the excitement. Van held still in position but kissed me with a tenderness that could never be expressed properly with words. His fingers started moving again in the narrow space between us. Expertly finding that little sensitive spot that made my heartrate increase. I attempted to move needing more, wanting all of him.

With an exercise in control Van took lead again, we were both inexperienced, but he was like a dancer that learned the steps quickly. There wasn't as much pain overshadowed now by a building pressure, one cresting like a wave. If this feeling was the ocean it would be the moments before a tsunami crashed on shore. Spots dancing in my vision and toes curling in response to the intense sensations I felt Van stiffen as we both came together.

Breath fast and skin damp with sweat Van rolled to one side, pulling me to rest on his chest easily. He kissed my hair and sweetly apologized. Though he had nothing to be sorry for, a peaceful contentment filling me. This is where I belonged, loved and protected in his strong embrace. Sleep came quickly as I listened to the steady thrumming of his heart beating a cadence in unison with my own.

I fell not into darkness but memories. Ones full of tender moments and confused emotions. Our past together, though some seemed not to have happened yet, none showed anything other that love. Strong, but sometimes unsure. Waking I had one memory particularly clear remain in the front of my mind.

It was right after I'd returned to Gaia, Fanelia, and Van. A year has passed between then and now, but it was clear as if it had just happened. Van had been overjoyed at our reunion and didn't waste anytime showing me the rebuilt city. It was so much to take in, but with our hands clasped together he grounded me. Once back at the castle orders were given to settle me into my own room, still what made my head spin the fastest was a stack of new dresses already prepared.

I hadn't decided on if I should start wearing the new Gaian approved wardrobe right away or if holding onto my foreign more comfortable clothing choices would have any negative effect this time around. On one hand I chose this life and dressing the part was to be expected. On the other side I'd just given up my whole world, what would a few odd outfits matter?

Deciding to sleep on the question I went to bed that night with all my normal clothes still packed in bags. When I woke the next morning, it was to find my belongings sorted except for my clothes. Fanelian dresses were hung up, but all the earth pieces were gone.

Angry and hurt that Van had made this decision without talking to me I stormed from my room. Surely none of the servants would take incentive without instructions. It felt like being violated to have my thanks taken, let alone while I was sleeping.

It took me a few unnecessary turns to find his room as everything was still so new, but in the end, I made it there just fine. Bursting through the door I almost lost steam to find the room empty.

"Van?" I called to the vacant space, expecting nothing in return.

Instead a response answered, muffled by a closed door. "Hitomi?" The question in the way he said my name reminding me of my missing clothes and how angry that made me. "Is something wrong?"

Even though he asked the man stayed stubbornly in the other room, so I found myself storming forward. The door opened easily under my hand, and I strode in ready to confront him. What I wasn't expecting was to find this to be a bathing room. In a second, I took in all the details, not of the room, because that wasn't important, but him.

Water fell in fat drops from his wet hair, though still unruly hung heavy as it did the time he'd waded into the Asturian canals to save me. This was not the boy he'd been, but a man, built with broad shoulders and well-defined chest. He soaked in the water, steam visible, even as below the surface was obscured by ripples from sudden movement.

Van had turned at my unexpected entrance, his back now facing the open door. "Sorry," I murmured preparing to leave embarrassed. It was then I noticed the stiff way he held his right shoulder. "Is everything alright?"

"Fine," He muttered, but that didn't hide the bright flush creeping up his tanned neck. "Pulled something in practice."

I should have left him alone, but why I burst in was no longer important. Wanting to help drew me towards the enormous tub. Van tensed farther, if only to wince at the way the movement upset the injury.

"Can I," The two words came out tentative, but I already knew what to do. I sat on the rim of the tub closest to him, trying not to trail my skirts into the steaming water. "Is it a strain or sprain?"

At my question Van peered back at me over his uninjured shoulder. "Strain, I think." He still seemed unsettled by my presence while he sat there trapped by his nudity. This was no longer about how I felt about him, or his very attractive physique, but about how I could help. I knew a thing or two about sports related injuries.

Quickly running through the differences between the two types of injuries, noticing the stiffness as I gently moved is shoulder in a slow rotation. Asking if the pain was sharp or dull. Was there a pop or did it feel more like a pulling sensation? Checking for swelling and if the muscle spasmed at all. Even asking what exercises he'd been doing when the pain first happened. Focusing on the injury and not the feel of his warm flesh, especially since there was so much of it.

After the examination I'd figured it was probably a grade two deltoid strain caused by overextension, a mid level injury, more likely that Van was downplaying the pain. With that in mind I lectured him about treating the stiffness with heat and not icing the area to reduce swelling first. He was quite familiar with small injuries like this that the immediate treatment was skipped over in place of comfort.

Even being scolded the athletic man seemed to relax into my touch, almost as if he just enjoyed being taken care of. Sure, he'd always have Merle and servants to take care of him, but this was something new, being on equal ground with someone. I liked it too.

Gently I massaged the tense muscle with practiced fingers. I was more used to this kind of injury in my hamstring or calf from incomplete stretching before a run.

After a few more minutes of companionable silence Van cleared his throat. "Did you need something Hitomi?"

I'd almost forgotten that I had rushed in on him naked because I was angry about something. It all seemed so silly now, though I was still a little upset at the invasion of privacy, but it seemed that I was also guilty of overstepping too. We spent far more time apart than together, so it was expected that we'd have to learn how to do this from scratch.

"Oh," My hands continued their action and I tried not to notice the rest of him there just below the surface of the water. "All my clothes from earth were gone this morning. I was mad you'd had someone take them while I was sleeping."

Van pulled just out of reach, as if he couldn't quite think clearly if I kept touching him. The wet hair moved with a clear shake of his head. "I have no idea what you're talking about." He turned towards me enough so that I could see the honesty in his eyes. "No one would take your things, and I certainly didn't order anything like it."

Feeling foolish I started to pull away, wanting to go back to my room and hide forever. Wet fingertips touched my wrist gently. Keeping me from running away. I could feel the roughness of callouses built from years of training, but before I could really get past the shock of him without gloves, his hand had dropped back below the water's surface.

"Wait in my room and I'll come with you to figure out what happened." His voice was understanding, and I felt a little unsteady.

"Sure," I agreed, smoothing out my skirt I noticed the hem on one side was damp and found I didn't mind. Once the bathroom door was shut behind me, I didn't know if I should be mortified or impressed. Bursting in on him like that, over something that seemed so trivial now. Of course, Van would never order my personal things away. Of all people here I probably should have rushed to a different conclusion. One with large cat ears and a history of going through my belongings.

I didn't have long to wait until Van strode out fully dressed in his normal style outfit; lose tunic shirt and tan pants. His hair was still damp, but I thought it had more to do with the naturally wild thickness than lack of care.

My cheeks heated thinking about how rude and reckless I'd been, but before I could apologize, he waved it off. Rolling his injured shoulder slowly. "It feels much better."

"You really should ice it." I lectured quickly though relieved by his easy understanding. The unsaid part was that the less we talked about nudity the better. We weren't children anymore, but neither of us had much actual experience, and even less time to truly get used to each other.

As it turns out I'd looked everywhere in my room, but a simple wooden chest normally used to hold extra blankets. Everything was there, neatly folded. I felt silly, but Van apologized saying that no one should have moved my possessions while I slept. Somehow, I thought the maid had been on orders from another source. One only second to the king before me, at least for the time being.

Waking into the present I found the arms holding me even in sleep the most comforting place to be. Surrounded by the warmth and scent of spring, of Van. My chest felt tight as if there wasn't enough room inside to hold all my happiness. The love I felt for this man pressing on the constrictions of my body, one that was sore but not unpleasantly so.

"Morning," I smiled up at Van, pressing my hand against the taunt muscles of his bare stomach.

The skin tensed rippling just below my touch. "How are you feeling?" He asked voice low with a note of concern. Van may have been worried about me, but I could already tell he was awake in more than one way.

Deciding action was better than words I didn't waste any time pushing him onto his back with a hand on the strong shoulder that had healed only days after the incident. I wanted to explore him fully until all his secrets belonged to me. This wasn't a battle of wills, there would be plenty of those later, but for now it was enough to just be here with him.

"Let me show you." I spoke the words the moment I rolled on top, bracing on my knees so that I could gaze down at him. A beautiful look of love and anticipation clear on his handsome face. His hands coming up to brace on my hips in approval. It would only take a breath until we were both exactly where we wanted to be.

I may not have dreamt of crowns and kingdoms as a child, but the responsibility is a very small price for the happiness that Van and I have found together.

This is not the end of our story, just the beginning.

**To Be Continued…**

**Well we see things from Hitomi's side here. I've become increasingly attached to perspective swapping chapters. It allows me to explore the same interactions with more personal details. All the chapters will not be exact retellings of what happened, there should only be overlapping at times that are incredibly important to both main characters. There should also be more interaction with other people soon. Van and Hitomi can't hide away in the bedroom forever, even though they want that right now.**

**There is a plot here aside from seeing how many times they can have sex in a chapter. There will be more of that as they are just starting the honeymoon phase, but that will unfortunately pass. Please stay tuned. I can't wait to hear what you think.**


	3. Shadows under the Sun

**Coming from a port-call in Boston. Patrol is almost over. I took a break from updating Blades and Bellflowers to throw an update this way. I will try to see if anything can be worked on for both stories for around the time I get home. I might not have the opportunity to once I get back to my family. So, nice long full chapter for you since it's been a bit since I posted this one. Finally getting past the wedding and into the early marriage stage. More comments at the bottom. Enjoy!**

**Strong Memories**

**Chapter 3- Shadows under the Sun**

Life is all about balance. Without it the scales can tip at any time, throwing normal into the wind. Peace time settles into your bones and it's easy to ignore the little things that pile up over time. Tiny stones that you don't notice until the weight overshadows all the positive on the other side. Happiness is like wearing blinders, it makes seeing anything but what is directly in front of you.

The first moon we spent married foreshadowed only good things. I love my wife, though the idea that we were finally allowed to be together was still something worth getting used to. Expectations merging with reality for once. Sometimes I still wait for the bottom to drop out plunging our happy lives into darkness. After all it's happened before.

Hitomi says I'm being pessimistic, but she also hasn't contradicted me about it either. As if stating that nothing bad would happen out loud would call out misfortune. For the time being I push all the negative possibilities to the back of my mind where they live, just a quite nagging feeling. Easy to ignore at times like this. Waking to the soft warmth of my slender beautiful wife, her smooth skin pressed comfortably against my equally bare form.

It's not that we got married and suddenly don't own a set of night clothes, but often find the barrier of fabric between our bodies to be unnecessary. The warmth of summer months just starting to settle in and sleeping uninhibited is almost a custom. Still I remember the way Hitomi reacted when I first explained that on nights of little breeze most people here, myself included opted for comfort over modesty. It was as though everyone she'd met spent the hottest few months entirely nude, and her flustered outrage was endearing.

Now that we were truly together, she'd seemed to warm to the idea. Again, this was only something done in the comfort of one's own home, behind closed doors. Watching the soft early morning light dust her flawless skin with a golden glow made other ideas begin to take shape. Anticipation waking the rest of me.

The light touch of my calloused fingertips caused the thick fan of her eyelashes to flutter slightly, a soft moan escaping parted lips. Encouraged I shifted slightly, Hitomi's slender form rolling more on her back as I leaned over. Mouth tracing the path my hand had followed moments before, neck, shoulder, to the swell of firm breasts. I almost stopped there, but the journey had only just begun.

Sensitive skin meeting my lips as if drawn to the contact by a powerful invisible force. This time her breathy moan said only my name, a note of pleading there. Fingers in my hair as she arches into my touch. Wanting to hear the sound again more than anything I continued down to her narrow waist. Side-tracked by the jut of one lean hip then the other. Instinct and anticipation causing the beautiful woman I love to spread her toned legs a touch wider.

My fingers leaving her to grasp those delicious hips. A small whimper at the loss of contact encouraging me. Completely bared and practically dripping, I tasted her and couldn't hold back the growling moan of my own. Worshipping her body with every movement. Hitomi nearly arched right off the mattress and would have if I hadn't been holding her to me, fingers digging into the flesh of her hips slightly.

Breath coming faster interspersed with moans of pleasure and gasps as the sensations built steadily. Continuing my attention even as her movements became wilder, and hands fisted the sheets. Grasping onto the knotted fabric as though it would save her from going over the crest. Yet I succeeded in pushing her past that last little bit of control. Head thrown back in ecstasy, voice raised in blissful release. Task complete I released my grip on her and sat upright.

Pleased I watched as her chest heaved with labored breathing, as though she'd just run a difficult race. Body trembling with the tell-tale signs of a task well-done. Those mesmerizing green eyes found my gaze, and the heat there made me throb. Before I could move over and into my very willing wife a solid knock sounded on our door.

I stilled as though if not twitching a single muscle would have the intruder leave faster. Instead they rapped on the wood harder, more insistent. Hitomi slung her long legs over the side of the bed as though intending to go get the door herself. With a heavy sigh I waved for her to get under the covers and stood. Pulling a robe of patterned blue and white diamonds over my nudity as I went.

The intention was to handle the interference quickly and return to finish what I'd started with Hitomi. Whoever it was needed my attention after all. With another loud knock I reached the door, checking that my naked wife was safely below the sheets.

"Coming," I called moments before opening the door. On the other side stood the curvy figure of my sister. Merle tapped her foot impatiently, fist raised to knock yet again. "What is it?" I asked sharply.

Undeterred by my tone she placed a clawed hand on each hip, "Took you long enough." Her sensitive nose wrinkled smelling Hitomi on me, and a spiteful part hoped she'd take that information and leave us to our business. Unfortunately, I was wrong, "You're needed at a council meeting."

"There isn't one scheduled this morning." I state evenly, trying to read her attitude, but failing as I always did with her.

"I know," Expressive blue eyes rolled reminding me that at eighteen moons Merle was both immature and wise beyond for her age. "A messenger came early this morning, and the council wants to see you, now."

The hope that she'd just relay information and leave was gone completely. Sent to fetch me the bright-haired girl would ensure I arrived at that blasted meeting regardless of my wishes.

"Fine," I sighed heavily. "I'll go dress and meet you there."

Before I could shut the door she chirped, "Don't forget to wash out your mouth."

Not that hiding what Hitomi and I did together would have mattered. It still felt like a pointed jab to have the specifics read so accurately. With an apology to the green-eyed woman remaining in my bed I went to wash and dress reluctantly. Still business over pleasure, and the need to hold a meeting so suddenly had my attention. Mind working through possible reasons, none of them pleasant.

When ready for the day I kissed Hitomi goodbye and left the room. Merle was still waiting, as though if left to my own devises I'd ignore her and the council entirely. I may have thought about it but wouldn't ever really do. Just want to.

"I don't need a chaperone," My tone clipped, as she matched my long strides effortlessly.

"Sure," She shot me an exasperated look. "For the last month you've spent more time in bed than anywhere else."

I opened my mouth to shoot back with a retort, but Merle waved the response away quickly. "Not that I care," I could tell there was more to it, but she continued. "It's to be expected. Still it'd be nice to know you haven't forgotten about the rest of us."

There it was, the note of tension and flippant remarks made sense now. My sister has always been there for me, and the moment I get married she no longer seems to have a place in my life. Merle may not ever say it, but my happiness has cost her. She grew out of that one-sided infatuation years ago, still to find herself on the outside of my attention has hurt. Hitomi and I have kind of been in our own world.

It wasn't all about bedroom acts either. I no longer seem to have the same need for my sister's council as before. I've spent more time in the last month practicing than talking to my oldest friend. Merle remains proud though, and she wanted me to come to her not the other way around.

Pausing mid-step she continues to walk ahead for a few strides as I watch, noting the agitated twitch of her striped tail. I really hadn't been paying attention to anyone aside from Hitomi, and that was unfair. Merle always wanted what was best for me even if it hurt her, so she'd never come out and say it. Part of her had to be waiting for the first inevitable fight; where I'd come back for advice or just someone to take my side in the argument.

My hand reached out on instinct catching her slender furred wrist in a loose grasp. Merle could easily shake off the contact. Instead she stopped walking, turning to face me, expression unguarded.

"Would it help if I said I was sorry?" My voice was soft, but I knew she of all people would hear me clearly.

She let out a soft laugh, tension draining away from those patterned shoulders, ones that once stood between me and enemy fighters. In that moment I knew I was forgiven. We may not share blood, but she would always be my sister. Even when I've been otherwise preoccupied.

"Well I guess it's understandable that you've been sex-absorbed." The sly look in her bright blue eyes made me shake my head and laugh in return.

"Don't you mean self-absorbed?" I asked as we started walking again.

"No," Merle grinned broadly. "I think I got it right the first time."

The emotions in the air between us much warmer. Even if it took conscious effort I'd try my best not to make her feel like Hitomi was more important to me. I loved them both in different ways. Just because I was married now didn't mean the rest of my relationships didn't matter.

We arrived at the council chambers and entered, her going in first. To most it might seem odd that Merle was included in meetings, but she'd proven a capable scribe, recording events and taking notes for me to address later. An assistant of sorts, the task suited her well.

When I did enter the room everyone seated stood, including Merle at her small desk placed strategically behind my chair. Being king isn't about fancy dinner parties, rich clothing, and court intrigue. Well I won't say it isn't like that in other countries, but not Fanelia, and never has been.

Ruling a country is mostly about maintaining balance. Managing resources so that they last, but the people can still benefit from them. Improving the overall status, but not too much as envy is dangerous. Maintaining relationships with other countries without showing favor to one over the other. Fanelia is small, and we do not seek power outside our boarders. The same cannot be said about everyone else.

Gaia had been thrown into chaos once by a country and ruler who sought power without care for cost. We still felt the ripple effect from Zaibach's actions five years later. As one of the key players in the Great Gaian War, I was respected by most despite my relatively young age. Still there was speculation and some general distrust that may never go away.

Again, I play a part in the political game, but I don't revel in it as others might. Everything I did was for my people. The long hours, piles of paperwork, and tedious meetings. The one thing I never considered was marrying for anything other than love. Hitomi had been the only woman for me from the moment our paths intertwined.

How could I not be happy? I finally had everything I'd ever wanted; a strong stable Fanelia, Escaflowne securely sleeping, the support of my clever sister, and love of the most amazing woman. I could handle an early morning meeting. It was far from the first and certainly wouldn't be the last.

Despite the suddenness of the councils' desire to convene most of the business addressed was routine. A few times I requested information from old meetings to clarify things, but Merle was able to put the papers into my hand easily.

A recurring trade disagreement where the other party swore previous terms had been agreed upon. Unusual migration of the land dragons to the west which had many concerned, yet no attacks had occurred. Questions about what should be done regarding Austuria's unorthodox wedding present of the old Castelo fort and surrounding lands.

Finally, we arrived at the new business around the time my stomach was ready to complain of its emptiness. The messenger this morning. Letters arriving from Daedlus in the north were not unusual, but its author was, Viscount Garrett Raine.

A titled poof who had started putting his long nose in Fanelia's affairs more so over the last couple of years. I'd counted myself lucky that business had kept him away from the wedding last month. His wife had come with apologies, but I'd rather deal with her. There was always a subtext to his comments. Even at the request of lodging in the palace, for an extended stay while handling some convoluted enterprise. Even in letter form he felt dishonest, as though chasing some other agenda. I wanted to say no, but couldn't, after all he was my only living cousin.

That was reason enough to keep him at arm's length. Even the council felt threated by his insistence to be a part of things here. Which is why they couldn't wait to approach this matter in a more sensitive way. To be honest they were just praying for Hitomi and me to announce a future heir, if we had a child Garrett would move from second in line to the third instantly.

Which was why they hadn't minded the preoccupation with my new wife. Work was still getting completed in a timely manner, but possibly a little less frequently. I still had duties beyond creating a royal line; but knocking my cousin down a few rungs would be a bonus.

Merle and I walked together in search of a delayed breakfast and found Hitomi already seated. Her smile was bright despite the concern in those beautiful green eyes.

"Is everything alright?" She asked, setting down her fork.

"The usual mostly," I responded leaning over to press a light kiss on her soft lips. "Garrett requested to stay here for around a month while he manages some inane venture." I took the seat next to her and was glad to see the food on the table still steaming. It seemed as though Hitomi had tried to wait for us, she was always thoughtful in that unspoken way.

"Is Tara coming with him this time?" Hitomi already knew of my dislike of the man, so it went without speaking. She pushed a platter of my favorite foods closer, short of filling my plate herself.

"Not that I can tell." The ease I felt with just Merle and her around would be short lived with my cousin prowling the halls. Garrett's wife was soft-spoken yet kind. I took after my father in our aversion to political marriages. King Goau's younger sister, an aunt I barely remember, had no such issue more than thirty moons ago. When a contract arrangement sent her to marry the third prince of Daedalus.

Garrett was the second son like me, but after his older brother died in a hunting accident, he became eighth in line for the Daedlus throne. Lower on the hierarchy each year it seems, as cousins ahead of him have more children of their own. Hopefully I will be added to that second group soon. Not that what we'd done this morning would help that goal, but it might have if we hadn't been interrupted.

Breakfast was pleasant enough and I made an effort to include Merle more in conversation. Being the third wheel couldn't have been very fun for her, but it was part of life. At one-point Hitomi asked her if she'd met her own special someone at the wedding, and that had my full attention. As far as I knew there had never been a man in my sister's life aside from me, and I was as far from a romance as possible.

The pretty blush dusting her patterned cheeks was a tell-tale sign that my wife had been far more aware of the neko girl than I.

"I don't know what you mean." Merle's eyes couldn't lie, and she seemed to be looking at anything but me.

Hitomi folded her slender hands together under her chin, the gold dragon on her ring finger glinting with the motion. "Really," There was a knowing smile that was even apparent in her voice. "Then who've you been writing to several times a week?"

My sister gaped for a second before putting on an unconcerned air, one that didn't reach the nervous ticking of her tail. Merle my have decent acting abilities if her stiff posture and honest tail didn't give her away.

"Just a friend." She sniffed as though this little bit of information was close enough to the truth to pass as such.

"Now, why don't I believe you," Hitomi grinned wider, enjoying the taunt. Possibly payback for the interruption earlier.

"It doesn't really matter what you believe." Merle bristled defensively. For a moment I thought I'd have to break up things before it became an argument, but Hitomi surprised us both with a lighthearted laugh.

"Okay, okay," She waved her hands through the air in a motion that the interrogation was over. "You know Merle I only tease you because I care."

"Sure," The younger girl snorted as though she didn't fully believe her.

"No, really." Her voice softer, all joking aside. "I'm not just your friend anymore. Merle, I'm your sister now. I hope you know that you can tell me anything and I will always support you."

As it normally was when Hitomi was forthright, the emotion hit straight to the heart, like a skilled archer always on target. Merle gave her a small smile in return that showed it meant something to her after all. She hadn't lost a brother but gained a sister. One that might just understand her in ways I couldn't

"I'm not lying about the letters being to a friend." Her voice was soft now, less sure, but there was a warmth in her eyes that I couldn't read. "It's Celena, we got closer at the wedding."

That was a slight surprise, for those two to be writing each other so frequently. Then again, the rare occasions where we traveled to Austuria or the Shezars came here the pair were often seen together. It was nice to know that Merle did have another close friend to confide in even if I did pull away unintentionally.

"That's nice," I responded, giving my food a bit more attention now that the tension had passed. "Maybe we could invite her to stay around your birthday." I'd never really got over my slight distrust of Celena, but it was more for her _other side_, than anything she could control. Dilandau appeared to be gone but not forgotten, still blaming the girl for what he'd done would be an unfair bias.

Maybe it was my thoughtful suggestion, or the off-handed way I no longer focused on her embarrassment, but Merle visibly relaxed.

"I'd like that." Was all she said and turned her attention to the cooling plate of food before her. A light blush still dusting those black striped cheeks. If Merle had found a love of her own, I'd be happy for her, but as a brother I couldn't help being relieved that it was only a friendship after all. Not that I'd ever deny my oldest friend her happiness, but I still felt the need to protect her even now that she was no longer the little cat-eared girl that once followed me into a war.

Hitomi for her part let the subject drop, but there was something in the way she still watched my sister. It was like she was trying to put together a puzzle in her mind but didn't have all the pieces.

We finished eating in light companionable conversation. Merle hurried off to her tasks researching information on the disputed trade agreements. I lingered for a minute too long before kissing Hitomi and telling her I'd see her in the evening. I have a stack of minor issues that would continue to grow if I didn't address them sooner rather than later. When I left the room, she remained sitting, her plate forgotten and gaze following my departure.

I didn't stop to ask what she'd do with her day as mine would be quite full. Sure, there were tasks that were traditionally managed by the Queen of Fanelia, mostly seeing to the day to day wellbeing of the people where the King focused on the overall prosperity of the country as a whole. I'd been handling both jobs since I returned after the war to rebuild. It wasn't necessary to burden Hitomi with that responsibility now. After all she never asked to be queen, why should the title carry extra weight if it didn't need to?

Arriving in my office I noticed the pile of work waiting for my attention with new eyes. The tasks though not difficult had been piling up since the wedding. Some of the lesser important items even that old. Merle hadn't been the only thing I'd been neglecting in favor of spending time with my new wife. Resolved to manage everything better I set to work.

Hours later the job seemed even more daunting. As though the more work I did the more there was to do. After skipping lunch almost entirely I asked for dinner in my office. Determined to tackle the majority of the tower by the end of the day. Somehow, I thought I had been managing things better than this, and it was entirely up to me to complete everything.

It was a welcomed surprise when my dinner arrived carried by Hitomi, a slight line of worry creasing her brow.

"I'm glad to see the paperwork hasn't buried you alive." I hastily cleared a corner of the desk, and she set the tray down. "Thought we'd need to organize a search party."

"That isn't entirely out of the question." I sighed wearily, leaning back in my chair trying to stretch stiff muscles.

"Why don't you eat something and call it a night?" Her voice held only concern for me.

"I'll eat, but there are still a few things I can address tonight." I waved off her worry not liking the idea of giving up before I got a better handle on things. "It's come to my attention that I've been distracted lately."

She stiffened, though I couldn't pin point what I'd said to trigger the reaction. I was probably more tired than I realized.

"Is there something I can do to help?" Hitomi asked one hand reaching for the nearest stack of documents.

Not wanting to bother her or risk the chaotic organization I had in place my hand intercepted hers.

"No," I answered quickly the one word coming out sharper than intended. Seeing the instant hurt on her face I turned the slender hand in my grasp over gently placing a kiss on the heartbeat at her wrist. "Thank you for the offer love, but I won't be much longer."

"Okay," She agreed taking her hand back slowly. Still there was a shielded expression on her face. Had this been our first true argument since marrying, or was she just letting things drop to prevent a fight? Regardless Hitomi left me to my work shortly after without another word.

It wasn't until a few moments after she departed that I realized it was the first time we hadn't kissed at parting in the last moon. Pushing the odd thought away work quickly took central focus again.

That night when I returned to our shared room Hitomi was already in bed, wearing a nightgown. The balcony doors were open, and a decent breeze circled the large room. It seemed oddly formal to start wearing night clothes now, but I didn't ask. Still when I lay down beside her and tried to pull her form to mine, she simply murmured that she was tired.

Being pretty exhausted myself I let her be. Still I missed the soft warmth of her skin against mine and it made falling asleep a longer process than normal.

The next morning, I woke to an empty space in bed beside me. Hitomi's nightgown tucked under her pillow for future use, it seemed she was already dressed for the day. I know I'm not the most sensitive person, but it was clear to even me that we were indeed fighting. Unfortunately, I had no idea why.

I tried to talk to Hitomi, but she seemed to be evading me. Later in the day Merle brought in the information she'd found about the trade dispute so far, and I told her about the sudden distance between me and my wife. Somehow, I thought she'd be on my side and agree that Hitomi was acting odd for no reason, instead she shot me a piercing look.

"You really are an idiot Lord Van," Straight to the point she wounded me.

"What?" I blinked confused how she came to that conclusion so clearly.

"Hitomi has never been like other women." She said this slowly as if I was in uncomprehending child.

"I know," Before I could say more the neko interrupted, apparently my sister had not finished speaking.

"In the time that you've known her, has she ever been happy doing nothing to help when she sees someone struggling?" I wanted to argue that I had been just fine with my workload yesterday, but before I could say anything, she rolled her expressive blue eyes and continued. "You made her feel useless and it's not like she has a job here aside from baby making. Some women would be happy with that life, but not our Hitomi."

She was right of course. Why was it so easy for her to see exactly how dense I had been? Being perceptive might be part of it, while the rest might just be how long the neko girl had known me.

"I'm an idiot." Was all I could say, replaying the entire interaction from yesterday in my head. I was so focused on blaming my poor work performance on how distracted I'd been that I missed meals, refused her help, and still came to bed late. It looks like I don't value her attributes that aren't physical.

"Be sure to start your apology like that." Merle grinned, sharp feline teeth visible as she reveled in my realization.

Before I could gather a reasonable retort, the door opened and in walked the woman I most wanted to see. Hitomi carried another food tray and a glance at the time showed I'd missed lunch. It warmed my heart that even though she was angry, she still would go out of her way for me. I really was a fool. It also showed how little responsibility she felt here, preforming a menial task just for something to do.

Merle gave me a knowing look that said if I didn't apologize she'd openly side with Hitomi, and soon neither of them would be talking to me. Without another word she left, leaving me and my angry wife alone.

"I thought you might be hungry." The bland tone of her voice meant I was definitely out of her favor. Setting down the tray Hitomi turned to go.

I reached for her wrist like before, but this time she twisted out of my grasp. Anger flashing clearly in her bright green eyes.

"Don't touch me," Her voice clearly not in an affectionate mood.

"I was an ass to you yesterday." Admitting the truth, I hadn't even realized until now. "I was punishing myself not you for letting things get this out of control. I'm sorry, pride cause me to refuse your help."

Some of the tension left her shoulders, but not all of it. This dispute was deeper than turning down an offer of assistance. Hitomi felt useless, I hadn't let her do anything aside from the obvious. No woman as strong willed as my wife liked to be treated as all she were good for was a bedmate. We both enjoyed those acts, I made sure if it, but there is more to a marriage. A true partnership.

"It might seem like I don't value you, but that is far from the truth." I hoped my sincerity flowed into my voice. My entire life Fanelia had been my driving force. This all happened because for a moment I realized that something, or in this case someone, had become more important for me. I felt guilty and that was not Hitomi's fault, just the opposite. The problem was I didn't know how to reconcile the two loves of my life now that I had both in my grasp.

How is it possible for me to favor them equally? Instead I pushed the troubling thought away and held my hand out to her. Not grabbing for the stubborn woman this time, just holding in place the scarred calloused fingers I'd hidden from most people my entire life. Not Hitomi though, she'd seen all of me even the ugly parts and found beauty in them.

Slowly almost reluctantly she placed her hand in mine. "I'm sorry if you felt unneeded." The last of the tension seemed to melt away. Merle had been right, Hitomi was at a loss without tasks of her own. "To be honest I could really use your assistance. I didn't want to ask because it's dull work."

"I want to help." Hitomi spoke, her voice light with purpose. Eyes darting to the forgotten tray of food. "After you eat something."

I couldn't help the small smile, relief clear. We seemed to be back on even footing, and it might take a while for me to get the hang of this balance, but she deserved the effort.

"Deal." I agreed easily. After I ate, we worked together stopping only for a dinner where we discussed some of the issues waiting on my desk still. Mostly she organized files and looked through older information for corresponding data. To be honest they were tasks normally done by Merle, but as my sister had her own research at this time sharing the workload wasn't an issue. It did make things flow much quicker.

I can't remember a time where I'd ever been this backlogged, so I'd have to come up with another use for her workwise once I was caught up. It wouldn't do to let her feel useless, when what kept me working such long hours was my desire not to have anything on my mind when we were together.

The longer we worked the more I noticed unsettling reports, but with no solid connection it just looked like a string of bad luck. Coincidence wasn't something I believed in, and I became engrossed with the problem. So much so that I hadn't realized how late it had become.

"Sorry, I hadn't noticed the time." I asked signing the last document and sliding it into the file where it completed the packet. Receiving no response from Hitomi I looked up.

There she was curled up on the small sofa off to one side of the office. Long legs folded into the tight space, arms cradling her head, chest moving with slow steady breaths. Fast asleep she looked so peaceful I didn't have the heart to wake her.

With movements as smooth as possible I slid my own arms underneath her form. Lifting caused Hitomi to shift finding comfort in the new position but remain solidly asleep. With each step I took her head bumped softly against my shoulder. It didn't take long to arrive at our room, and with a tense moment of careful balancing I was able to open the door without disturbing her. My strides towards the bed were smoother with the end goal in sight.

Hitomi sighed a gentle breath as I settled her into the soft mattress. Without another thought I kicked off my shoes and climbed in right next to her, pulling the blankets right over the both of us. All I wanted was to hold my wife as we slept and bothering with anything else seemed unnecessary.

It only seemed like moments later when a hand on my shoulder forced me awake. Despite my original assessment of time, bright sunlight came through the windows in thick bands. It was late in the morning. Hitomi sat up rumpled and groggy, but she'd been the one to wake me.

"Van," Her voice a little scratchy with lingering sleep. "We overslept."

She was right of course. Working into the night has happened to me before, but not waking up at a reasonable hour hadn't, until now. Our clothes from yesterday looked about as bad as I felt, but we'd be expected to be up and active by now. For a moment I debated on shutting the rest of the world out and spending the remainder of the day alone with my wife.

Except she was already attempting to prepare for work. I felt disgusting, the old clothes sticking with sweat from sleeping in them. Washing quickly, I came out of the bathing room to find Hitomi trying to smooth down her short hair, unsuccessfully.

Attempting to hide my amused smile, and failing, I pointed her to the vacant chamber. With a wrinkle of her nose she agreed and disappeared inside. For a moment I hesitated the desire to follow her rather strong. Thoughts of her smooth bare skin after a few days without much physical contact made my pants tight, but already being late forced the pleasant idea away.

I skipped breakfast as it was nearly time for the mid-day meal. Heading directly for Merle's reserch desk in the library. She of course gave me a good-natured lecture about sleeping the day away and letting my work pile up, again. By the time I had the results of her findings I was fully back in task-mode, but even more disturbed by what she'd uncovered. There seemed to be two entirely different contracts for the same shipment, and both had my seal. How was that possible?

Add that with the problem I'd discovered last night things weren't adding up right. I was back at my desk growing more engrossed with the unconnected issues when Hitomi appeared a short while later. She at least looked refreshed, and in better spirits. Determined to come back to the strange issues I set them aside and started work on a different less perplexing report. Hitomi happy with her tasking of filing and reorganizing hummed lightly as she moved around the room.

We paused to eat neither of us realizing how hungry we'd been until the food was in front of us. Conversation virtually nonexistent, but the mood quite companionable. Returning to work for a few more hours before I reached the end of my obligated issues. Having caught up nearly a month of work in three long tiring days.

Hitomi finished her task a little while before and had been reading patiently while I completed the last report. Happy with the work, but stiff from being stationary so long I stretched. The kinked muscles protesting the movement. At my low groan she stood and moved behind my chair. Slender practiced hands kneading the knots right out. I sighed and thanked her, my eyes closing as to enjoy the way her fingers knew the exact placement and pressure I needed.

After a little while I felt her motions change, softer lingering touches. I reached for Hitomi, guiding her from behind me. Her eyes held a heat that I knew well, and as it had been a few days I welcomed greedily. Before I could make a move, she beat me to it, climbing into a position of control. Her long legs straddling me, pinned into the chair looking up.

It didn't matter who instigated the kiss because it swallowed us both, fire burning through my blood. There wasn't time for the proper removal of clothes, just blind hands freeing her breasts as I continued to kiss her as though my very life depended on the task. I felt the tightness of my breeches give way as I to was released from the confines of restricting fabric. There wasn't a chance to feel air against my heated flesh as Hitomi slid down onto me with a moan that equaled mine, skirts bunched up roughly

Our motions full of need and passion unconcerned with time or place. Pent-up as I was it was a surprise, I didn't finish early, the desire to hear those increased noises of pleasure keeping me from the finish line before her. The frantic movements cresting to a crescendo together.

Bathed in the blissful surge of love for her I kissed Hitomi again, this time a long lingering one full of the tenderness I felt for her. Her breaths still raged and body unwilling to part company with mine just yet.

In an instant the moment was shattered by an unmistakable noise. Slow distinct clapping, coming from just inside the door of my study. Shocked and shy by the interruption Hitomi curled over pressing her burning face into my chest, hands shaking as they pulled up the bodice I'd pushed out of the way.

Fury rolled through me as I looked into the cool grey eyes of the intruder, his neatly trimmed black hair smoothed back fashionably.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded harshly.

"I wrote a proper request," He answered in that taunting way I hated. The man knew exactly what I meant and proceeded to push me.

"Not in Fanelia," I gritted out, the only reason I didn't attack him was the compromising position I was still stuck in with Hitomi in my lap. "In my office."

"Enjoying the performance of course." I wanted to beat that condescending smile from his face. "What else should I do cousin?"

"Get out, Garrett." My voice was low, dangerous, and better men would have feared my temper then. Instead the troublesome Viscount just laughed before letting the door shut behind him.

I couldn't get him out of my palace and country fast enough. Unfortunately, he was family, damn the smug bastard to hell.

**To Be Continued…**

**Ah ha ha ha ha. Sorry I couldn't resist. So, we see some tension starting to build. Van has stress starting to fray the honeymoon phase. Hitomi just wants to be useful, but he thinks keeping her from responsibility is a kindness. The poor misguided man. We see some of the differences in the way Hitomi and Van view things starting to show through. The month of bliss is over. **

**We see some drama from Merle too. Also introducing Garrett Raine. He's going to be so much fun to play with. Not based off anyone, but a new character to fill a role, like his wife Tara. There will be maybe a total of four or five new faces to round out the story. With varying states of importance.**

**For those familiar with my stories, mature ones especially… I've never written oral sex before. Of course, the couple both being virgins in chapter one would start with the standard position, but as they now have more practice has become more confident with each other. I've had the pair have sex in Van's office in Broken Promises, but that was naked on the floor. This was quick and dirty with Hitomi taking the lead. When writing mature sections I try to be detailed without being raunchy. Trying to focus on emotions and reactions rather than slapping flesh. Uhg I just shuddered at that visual image.**

**I still remember the first M-rated story I wrote a one-shot called Late One Night. I was a little nervous I hadn't skirted the line well enough. Miniclio was one of the first to read it and she responded with "it was soft-core at most". Thank you friend, that still makes me smile and feel a little better to this day. **

**Well I think this was a little more detailed then that story. This is after all about what takes place after the happy ever after. Whoever said marriage was easy lied. People grow and change, small things build into big problems. Van may run into some issues adapted from ones I've had. Like being accused of making all the decisions without consulting my other half. From myside I excluded him from things I knew he hated, but not being asked was a sore subject. You see a little of that in how he coddles Hitomi and she hates it.**

**Can't wait to hear what you think.**


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